Sunday, March 25, 2007

Spare Me..authored by anonymous poet

This poem was shared by a female friend of mine that didn't want to put herself on blast online. Since it's going on my blog(cause she doesn't have one), her identity will remain intact. I get the impression that some brother's have done some skulduggery to her and she decided to put elements from different dudes in her poem.

Though I don't agree with this form of male bashing, it allows for the dudes that still role like this to come up with some new ways to run their game.

Spare Me
your hopes and aspirations for your next relationship (in which it could be me)
Spare Me
the calls in between your travels to and from your girlfriend's house
Spare Me
the comparisons of how great I am next to your ex-wife
Spare Me
the continual dropped calls that I find it hard to reach you in between
Spare Me
the stories about your closet friends and how they are players and you aren't
Spare Me
the drama that your momma continues to give you in your adult life
Spare Me
the details of the great weekend that you and your child that I've never met had
Spare Me
the "can you call to wake me up" requests when you have an alarm
Spare Me
the highlights of your vacation in which you not once called me
Spare Me
the description of the "friend in need" that always tends to call during our outings
Spare Me
the explanation about how busy you are when I have much more on my plate
Spare Me
the consideration of leaving after intercourse when I really want you to stay
Spare Me
the introductions to family members that just met your other relationship hopefuls
Spare Me
the hearty embrace that I will long for another (7) days until your return
Spare Me
the explanation of why you were in my neck of the woods without even calling me
Spare Me
the date planning that never actually has a time on it until the day of
Spare Me
the work schedule that should be able to accommodate me but rarely does
Spare Me
the info about the other call you must address rather than speak with me
Spare Me
the inquiries into whether I am the one for you, just for me not to be the one
Spare Me
all the bull--- that comes with you, my brother


KIKI said...

Tell your girl she needs to take a bow...cause I am feelin her. And yeah, hopefully this will encourage your fellow brothers to step their game up, Key word...hopefully (but doubtful).

Shai said...

How is this male-bashing?

Mizrepresent said...

I agree Shai, gf was just speaking her truth...and for some others.

IYMS said...

It's great when we as women can put our foot down. Sometimes you have to get "sick and tired of getting sick and tired".

Sheletha said...

im diggin it...

Sheletha said...

*snap snap snap*

dc_speaks said...

ok...some of the things that my friend alluded to are out of line. some of them are just downright uncontrollable.

Since I subscribe to the intentionally revoked players card club..I disagree with many of the "spare me"situations!

I'll only address a few of them: #1
why wouldnt a man share his hopes and aspirations for next relationship? How would you know what both of you are getting into? would it be best to enter into a relationship without know the possibilities of changes in status, IE:financial, job or location.

2. how would anyone know what calls are made between the travels..i guess perception is reality.

3. some of my closest friends might be players..some of your closest friends might be hoes..i can only be judged by the content of my own previously stated some of my friends' woman should be real glad that I was with their dude to prevent him from boning someone else.
4. I have 2 sons, one of which lives with me. there is always mixed emotions as to when is the time to introduce kids to someone new. Kids are like sponges and everyone has their own comfort level. Parents tend to enjoy outings with ttheir kids, if a woman doesn't want to hear about that aspect of a man's life, then perhaps she isn't around for the right reasons.

thats my opinion!

Khoney330 said...

Just me, but I'm thinking someone needs to exhale. If you're that unhappy with a man, get rid of him. I have a low tolerance for BS, so if I feel these things are happening to me, then, I give the brother his walking papers.

Shai said...

@DC, you still did not say how it was male-bashing. SMH. LOL.

@khoney, the poem appears to be an expelling of air. LOL.

dc_speaks said...

@Shai..then you aren't paying attention

some of the things that she listed could be being in the neck of the its a free contry..personally since I dont have stalker tendencies..i go where the f**k I want. if it was in anyones neighborhood..tough sh*t.

also..regarding phone calls.."hey, I need to take this call" oftentimes is met with a "why" if a motherf*****r is programmed to answered that question because he knows it is coming, then he may be prone to give the information up before "why" comes.

i consider it male bashing because she ended the poem with "spare me all the bull that comes with brother"

not all of the things that she listed have anything to do woth bull and it also sounds like she is dragging all of her past woes into every other situation...thats why.

anyone else??? hmmmmm?

KIKI said...

OK DC. While I'm still feeling this poem I do have to bend a little and say that you are right about somethings.

Alot of the "spare me's" do appear to be based more on assumption than fact, but maybe in her world what she originally thought was just a "bad feeling" or "sneaking suspicion" actually turned out to be true.

The one about don't tell me how all your boys are players but your not...your perception may be true for you. I'm sure that you are that guy who trys to keep your boys in check while you're out. But those cases are few and far between. Experience has shown me birds of a know the rest.

And you can't blame a person for bringing baggage from previous relationships into their current ones. I'm not saying it's right but we're only human. We learn from experience, and if someone has been continously hurt or screwed over in the past and they start to see the same behavior in the person their with now, why should they assume that this relationship is going to be any better than the last one.

I can see how one might perceive this as male-bashing, but I think she was just speaking from her heart which may not be everyone elses truth, but it's hers.

CapCity said...

(taking a real world break:-)...I'm glad the sistah exhaled & got it out of her system. HOWEVER, I'm a strong believer that we must SPARE OurSELVES, sistahs!

I don't know if any of you youngsters recall the Richard Pryor character, Sharp Eye Washington in "Uptown Sat. Night", when asked why he swindled Poitier & Cosby's characters, his response:"Why not you?"

Don't continue to take buffoonery personal. Some of the clowns we meet are just that = clowns - enjoy the circus & when it leaves town - LET. IT. GO.

Anonymous said...

so, you post then shoot down my poem, for conversation purposes of course. No problema.

Let me respond:
- people do share their aspirations too soon at times getting you excited then leave you hanging. People should give it more time (at least make it over the 3 week hump) before sharing certain things. It spares people's feelings.
-the brother told me that he was on his way to his girlfriend's house. However, he still wanted to get with me.
-true people can be players and have friends that are not. So, why dwell on it. Keep it real, be yourself but be consistent while in their company (i.e., continue to answer the phone, text me and etc.) He's your boy, not your booty buddy.
-parents should enjoy their kids. Don't brag about what you and the last girlfriend did and how soon they (she and your son) met if you don't plan to introduce me.
-in someone's neck of the woods when they mentioned that they'd be elsewhere (especially someone trying to hook up with you.) Not acceptable!
-answering the phone and telling you it's their girl, Lisa who needs his help because she is going through whatever...once again, not necessary and he can keep it to himself.
-yes, both hoes and players choose their own paths. Does that make it right that your friend the player may be playing one of my hoe friends without her knowing? Not!
-actually these aren't past woes, all are quite recent, unfortunately.
-not male bashing at all. Love the brothers but would prefer being spared the bullshit!!!

By the way, I don't believe in fucking coincidences! So, spare me!

dc_speaks said...

@anon...if you would rather handle this publicly we can do that...I told you that I didnt agree with it and everything that I stated in my rebuttal to Shai is applicable...So I didn't shoot you down...if its on my blog, per your permission, then that means I am and anyone else is able to address it.

I think it's wrong as hell to categorize dudes and make your own perceptions..their reality..

just becuase you dont believe in coincidences, doesn't mean they don't exist.

If my player friend was dealin with your hoe friend, then they deserve each other...I choose to take a different path.

we are just going to have to agree to disagree...plain and simple

Shai said...

See I took it as if a brotha is like that approaches her to spare her. Not that every guy she that approaches her will be that way. Just my perception.

Anonymous said...


I didn't think nor plan to catergorize these brothers. This was their approach. I didn't have to accept it and I didn't.

So, babe spare me the elementary rebuttals. You know they were wrong. They took away from the flattery of even being approached by (6) men in such a short period of time. It wasn't kosher then and will never be.

You're still mi hermana. You know that is some messed up sh--. I think one of your boys did scew over my girl, too. We won't go into that. You just keep it real and keep blogging.

I believe we must agree to disagree. Like they say, "Niggers and flies.." You probably know the rest.

dc_speaks said...

elementary man..ok we going to just let this one slide...

don't blame it on one of my boys..both of them knew what it was when they fu****d each other...I wasnt there and neither were you.

im going to keep it real, but never try to front on me on my shit calling me elementary again!! Straight up!

I respect yours...respect mine or don't invite me or my readers into your world....flat out!!

thank you for your time and cooperation in this matter! Have a nice day!

dc_speaks said...

lol@niggers and flies!!! hahahahahaha

Man With Balls said...

Who wrote this SHIT!

Shai said...

DC, I do believe if the poem does not apply to you why have a problem with it.

dc_speaks said..., as previously stated, I don't like generalities and categorizations.

Dont give me that line that if it doesn't apply to me, it shouldn't bother me! I don't care! Im opinionated, and this is my forum!

How about that!

dr.Girlfriend said...

Poetry is an expression of one's thoughts, emotions, ideas or experiences via written form. If we accept that definition as a viable one, "Spare me" is the poet's reality whether imaginative, presumptuous, unfair male bashing, inappropriate, etc. This was her therapy-to let go of her experiences via written expression. However, if one publicly shares it -well certainly it is open to ridicule and appraisal. As far as male bashing, it is what it is-male bashing is simply negatively stereotyping men whether it is the poet's reality or a shared reality.

JustMeWriting said...

I know it's late, but I agree with Khoney, capcity and kiki for the most part. We have to spare ourselves...people not just MEN, will only do what you allow. AND... sometimes men come with good intentions and we (women) and the issues we may or maynot have cause them to want to SPARE US...OR SPARE THEMSELVES FROM US. I'd say...check yourself and your behavor before concluding that a dude is full of crap.

KIKI said...

Right on justme!

@Cap...I love it when the circus comes to town!LOL

JustMeWriting said...

thank you kiki...I actually came back, because I forgot to give big-ups to capcity for making mention of one of my favorite OVERWATCHED movies...LOVES IT.. Just watched "Let's Do It Again"

dc_speaks said...

ya'll must have liked this post...thanks for all the comments