Friday, March 30, 2007

Pot Luck Friday

I think that I'm a revolutionary in a way so I will do something a little bit different today. I am going to make Friday's POT LUCK FRIDAY..

What I would like to do is get some feed back from some non blogging readers or some bloggers that don't have the time to blog right now on a Monday morning topic. A wish list if you will.

There is no topic off limits! I know that relationship posts are common but be more specific. What element of the relationships? Finding one, keeping one, how to get out of one..all are up for discussion and friendly debate. FRIENDLY DEBATE!!!

Or perhaps children, we did names...what else can we do? Miz epresent had a blog recently on obesity, school lunches and lack of phys ed in school. What else can be brought to the forefront?

I am an information junkie! Garbage in--garbage out! But, I still like to process information. So, I'd like to try to start a day where the readers are in control of a single question, we take it as a group and discuss it in a civil manner. If it goes well, then it could be really fun.

Have a fantastic weekend and let's come up with some great questions to kick around the campfire!

SO without further delay.....who is up for the challenge?

To Pee or not to Pee...that is the question! REPOST one of my first blogs..ever!!

Recently I've been actively networking online and I've already come in contact with some very interesting people. The serious question that comes to mind is "isn't this supposed to be fun?" Everyone and their mother, brother, uncle, sister and cousin takes online sites way too seriously. One of my new online acquaintances(whom I will not name) on myspace had a guy blasting her with every kind of defamation comment in the world..... and why do you ask....because she refused to pee on him...
(yeah like R. Kelly or Dave Chappelle as R. Kelly) even funnier. WTF....I was like "hell nah...you're bullsh****g."



She was dead serious and sent me alllll the emails this dude sent to her and all her replies to him..at first thought, I was like...um...and where does this dude live...LA or New York...nope...right here in Cleveland!

What possible satisfaction could someone get from the humiliation of a "golden shower"...LOL? Please explain it to me, I really want to know. Folks are really tripping bringing their drama to the net. Is it because of the fact that they can assume whatever personality they want...a computerized, web cam chameleon?


OR a button clicking, bi-polar, schizophrenic, delusional individual with a weapon in the 21st century?


Hell...maybe if they keep changing personas, they will find out who they really are! Wait, I really don't want that to happen...if people stop acting crazy and tripping out, then I can't write about some of the stories that happen to my online pals....

Keep on acting up....I need the material for my blogs!!! LOL

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Verb: That's what's happening!!

My absolute favorite School House Rock Video!!

School House Rock Thursday!!!!




Enjoy!!

Figure 8..School House Rock

My second favorite....you should hear me singing it!



You will be singing this too!!

Enjoy all!!!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Friends: most overrated and overused word!

Have you ever considered the fact that calling someone your "friend" may not necessarily be a good thing? We already know that the interpretation of the word is subjected to the perceptions of the listener as well as the speaker.

Hmmmm..friends of the opposite sex may view the term really differently and should be explained thoroughly.

Take for instance this scenario:

Guy: Hey, Sally! Thanks for coming out with me tonight! I had a great time!
Gal: Awwww, thanks, Billy. I had a great time too. *gentle kiss on the cheek*
Guy: I'd like go out again with you....soon.
Gal: Me too! I think it's a wonderful idea! You're a "nice" guy. I'm glad we're friends!

screeeeeeeeeechhhhhhhh!!!!!!

It is at the very moment that the definition of friend needs to be emphasized! Dude is trying to get with ole girl and she's placed him in the "Friend Zone". Or has she?

The problem is that dude doesn't know what kind of friend he is to her. Is she open to the advancements? Will she be surprised if he hits her with the"I want to be more than friends" line? But, on the other hand, does she realizes that "nice guy" term generally means the kiss of death to dudes? probably not!

In other instances, people use the word to describe some acquaintance of theirs. Perhaps someone they exchange pleasantries with more than once or twice in a social setting. Even someone that they grew up with.

*note to self*-just because I've known them for 20 yrs, doesn't make them my friend

Here's my questions about the friend label:

Men-Women relationship
1. What does friend mean to you if there is romantic interest in either party?
2. Does the label of friend change to dating because you had sex?
3. Is there a way out of the "Friend Zone"? other than sex, of course...lol
4. What do you expect them to do as your friend? Be more creative than "just be there for me" whack a$$ line
5. Are there any words that are synonymous that can be substituted for clarity?

Same Sex relationship
1. What is required for them to lose you as a friend?
2. What makes you think they are your friend? Is it based on not having any problems with them after several weeks/months/years?
3. Is there a system of merit/demerits?
4. How do you determine "best friend(s)?
5. If there is no test of loyalty, do they just remain your friend forever?

Just a few questions. I'd like for us to be creative. Either add more questions or answer questions. I think in the midst of all the chaos regarding relationships in general, the missing ingredient is effective communication. We can start right now!!!! Someone could have saved me from embarrassment, just by telling me that friend really meant.."no..we can't do that..we're friends"...but you're a great guy/gal!

Who is up for the challenge?

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Big Ten Champions and counting..OSU!!!




I had to come back home to my blog after Lo hit me with the "Gator Chump" music! I think giving my Buckeye squad some love is only fitting for the occasion!




Thanks to Lolita and Rich pickin wif me about our respective schools, I feel compelled to let them see what is coming their way IF Florida makes it to the championship game.

So this one's for you two!(and any other gator fan)

Monday, March 26, 2007

The barbershop rule!

This is a true story of an account that happened at my barbershop recently. I had to go see my dude "T.K." because my beard/mustache, sideburns was looking a little too much like "wolfman Jackson". While waiting to be cut next, I noticed that his woman was there in the salon sitting in one of the chairs. I give dude mad props for having her picture up on the wall behind his station, so I immediately recognized her and said"hey,you're _____" She laughed and asked me how I knew. I told her that her face was a dead give away...the hairstyle often can't hide a face that i see every week.

Anyway..dudes talk in barbershops normally in a very free types of conversations. The things they certainly would not say around their woman, definitely may come out in the chair. So as the multiple conversations arose, generally about women, I noticed her getting real salty..so I decided to stoke the fire a little bit by reminded the fellas that there was a woman present and that she shouldn't be privvy to all this "man talk". Man the sh*t hit the fan then! She came at us with all the stories about no good ni99as not taking care of their kids at home, hangin out with their boys, needing that "me time" was an excuse to kick it...on and on.. Replies of "well if she(meaning whoever he was kicking it with)didn't like the way she was getting treated, then she can leave...there's plenty of fish in the sea"...or the classic line of "oh, well.." far too many to list anyway. She came back like she was defending the entire female gender like a champ though. I was just listening.

To my surprise most cats kinda settled down and I was like nahh f**k that...there is a place for dudes to have these conversations and I told her that she was "infringing on our turf"! My barber jumped in and defended most of the statements being made by the fellas and agreed with my assessment. He was like"see..you shouldn't be up in here anyway" I applauded his resolve, but doubt seriously if he got some that night! LOL!

I know that this topic may sting a little bit but my question is this..why would a woman feel it necessary to invade a barbershop and talk sh*t? Do we need have have the unwritten law amended as a constitutional right to have one place where we can congregate without being harassed? If the shoe was on the other foot and a dude was in a hair salon, women would have tried to string us up by our nuts.

I would like to get some feedback if possible regarding this matter. Anyone up for the challenge!

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Spare Me..authored by anonymous poet

This poem was shared by a female friend of mine that didn't want to put herself on blast online. Since it's going on my blog(cause she doesn't have one), her identity will remain intact. I get the impression that some brother's have done some skulduggery to her and she decided to put elements from different dudes in her poem.

Though I don't agree with this form of male bashing, it allows for the dudes that still role like this to come up with some new ways to run their game.


Spare Me
your hopes and aspirations for your next relationship (in which it could be me)
Spare Me
the calls in between your travels to and from your girlfriend's house
Spare Me
the comparisons of how great I am next to your ex-wife
Spare Me
the continual dropped calls that I find it hard to reach you in between
Spare Me
the stories about your closet friends and how they are players and you aren't
Spare Me
the drama that your momma continues to give you in your adult life
Spare Me
the details of the great weekend that you and your child that I've never met had
Spare Me
the "can you call to wake me up" requests when you have an alarm
Spare Me
the highlights of your vacation in which you not once called me
Spare Me
the description of the "friend in need" that always tends to call during our outings
Spare Me
the explanation about how busy you are when I have much more on my plate
Spare Me
the consideration of leaving after intercourse when I really want you to stay
Spare Me
the introductions to family members that just met your other relationship hopefuls
Spare Me
the hearty embrace that I will long for another (7) days until your return
Spare Me
the explanation of why you were in my neck of the woods without even calling me
Spare Me
the date planning that never actually has a time on it until the day of
Spare Me
the work schedule that should be able to accommodate me but rarely does
Spare Me
the info about the other call you must address rather than speak with me
Spare Me
the inquiries into whether I am the one for you, just for me not to be the one
Spare Me
all the bull--- that comes with you, my brother

Friday, March 23, 2007

tagged..I'm it!

I was tagged by Shai...thanks a lot!

What main lesson have you learned in the month of February?
Just because you have known them a long time, it doesn't make them your friend.

What bad habit do you want to rid yourself of this month?
enabling others.

What are your favorite muses?
nature sounds, songs without lyrics and black & white arts/pictures

Name one thing Uniquely Different that you recently discovered about yourself?
My opinions of others matters less to me. I take people at face value and deal with them on my terms.

What is your definition of passion vs intimacy?
Passion
is emotion that doesn't require anything other than an idea. Intimacy
is an outward expression of feelings normally focused on an individual.

What are you vibing too?
Hidden beach: Volumes 1 & 2
Fred Hammond
Old School hip hop

What are your favorite gadgets?
cell phone, computer, and mp3 player

What would be a perfect date with the person you're thinking of right now?
I pleads the 5th! LOL

Last book read?
reread John Grisham's "A time to Kill"

What would you rename in based upon your perception of the storyline?
How to protect your children...101

How many times do you look at your blog or the blogs of others?
Far too many to count...check your site meter, you can tell me!..LOL

Who's your favorite blogger or spot you find lurking around most often?
All my new family of bloggers get regular visits. I don't have a favorite!

If you were to live the opposite sex for the day, what name would you give yourself?
Dana..close enough to my own name

Describe yourself in 3 adjectives
Intense, Helpful and Loving

One goal you set for yourself for the month of March.
To finish my short story for Blogger's delight

I tag Cortney Gee, Justmewriting and IYMS!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

5, 10, 15, 20...stop!!

Oh yeah...sorry to "borrow" from Cortney Gee, but I won't call it the same name! All I know is I'm going to call this "School House Rock Thurday"...LOL

Have fun, ya'll!



I really did miss this stuff!

Monday, March 19, 2007

Time will reveal...this ain't just Debarge!

Over the years, I have heard of some great debates taking place over a
very simple topic. What topic are you talking about, D.C.? Well...I'm
so glad you asked. Very simply put...time! Everyone measures time in
their own way. To each person, their time has either little, no or
great value to them, though amazingly, the time of others may deviate
depending on the other individual.

In a recent conversation with a friend of mine, I was reminded of a saying that I had heard on numerous occasions in my younger years"Don't let a lack of planning on
your part constitute a sense of urgency on mine". It really wasn't until this morning that I really felt the value of that statement. That statement came in a conversation referencing how other people view your time, comparing how "YOU" view your time.

It really is funny how hearing things at a different point in your life causes a totally different perspective on the same verbiage!

Anyway,we have all heard the terms that reference time at some point in our lives so I will only deal with a few of them and we can kick them around the campfire.

1. Time heals all wounds

2. Time is money

3. Time to get right with God

4. Time to take this relationship to the next level

5. Colored People's time

6. All good things come to those that wait(ref. time)

7. It's time to move on(ref. past relationship or mourning a loved one)

8. Time to get back out on the dating horse

There are certainly more that can be thrown up for discussion but we have enough to deal with in just those 8 listed.

I have a background entrenched with a network marketing philosophy of never trading time for money in a linear sense. Always find a way to receive residual income when any opportunity presents itself. Residual income merely means to do something one (time) and get paid for it over and over again. I hope Ididn't insult any one's intelligence, but it is not a common term used in society. We are all more accustomed to residual debt..ie: the bills that come every month after we make the one call for installation, like the heat, gas, or light bills...LOL!

I actually wanted to let the first of the eight ride it out, but I guess I can't do that. There are some of us that just don't care about different facets of life and impose our way of thinking on everyone else. Since this is a touchy subject, even for me, we can keep it on a lighter note. I guess the person that actually started that saying was probably attempting to console someone or give them a feeling that
there will be light at the end of the tunnel.

What has happened possibly since its intended meaning is a warped display of a
judgemental demeanor in which the speaker now places their perception of time on the recipient. I have heard on more than a few times that a person should"be over that by now" referencing a death or a break up. Some of the most heart wrenching times of my life are still difficult to deal with, yet I have had someone tell me.."You should be over that by now". I'm sure everyone can relate to that dumb a$$ line in some way
or another.

Here's another one that tends to be so liberally used that the insult has been lost in humor. Colored people's time..definition-black people are late! What the hell? Come on ya'll is this really a joke. Is it really funny to be associated with yet another negative connotation? I don't advocate any kind of ethnic banterings, so I do find it to be ignorant! Where's the difference if we say all women are late?

To but a debatable topic on the forefront for Monday isn't my goal, but over the last 10 hours, I have come to the conclusion that using time as a means to control the actions of others is a ploy used by men and women so matter of factly that it bears being put on front street. Some of you may agree, others may not...but in my opinion, we are all guilty of manipulation and falling prey to it every day of our lives.

I know that everything happens in God's time and that things happen according to His permissive will or His Divine will. Let's leave it up to Him and He will direct our paths.

Happy writing and have a great week!

Friday, March 16, 2007

I'm just a bill...school house rock

Well...since I've been asked about this and it seems to be the most popular one..

Here it is...just because im reader sensitive to the requests of my peeps:

Enjoy!!

oh and bring your kids along for the ride!

Interjections--walk down memory lane

Ok...I had to do this one too!



for my fellow "The Collective" peeps and other literary homies..

Make sure that you use proper grammatically structured sentences!!!LOL

That's why I'm watching them now!

Enjoy!

And, But, & Or...conjunction junction

I love youtube!!! I am going to take a page from some of my newfound blog family members today! I'm going to give you some major nostalgia today!!

I wish that the children of the new millenium could have experienced some of the educational shows that I saw on Saturday mornings. Well, since they didn't have them now..we can bring it to them via Youtube!



This video is for everyone...

WARNING: YOU WILL BE SINGING THIS FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL DAYS

Thursday, March 15, 2007

"I said, NO!.... he exclaimed...wtf!!!!

Not to really try to piggy back off of homeboy Rich's post yesterday, but I think it requires a lil bit of attention. I was stunned, shocked and downright amazed at a Cleveland Plain Dealer article on the dramatic rise of Sexual Harassment Complaints by men in the workplace.

When did this happen....did the sexual liberation take it to new heights? When did women truly become the aggressors in making lewd or inappropriate comments at the workplace?

I can vividly recall in my teen years asking a young lady for her phone number and being verbally abased for "fraternizing" with the co workers. Now it seems the tables have turned.

Has it gotten to the point where the ratio of women to men has beaten up on women that much? Or has it just gotten to the point where now..women wear the pants and have no problem asking for it(sex)...just like men do? What defines harassment anyway? Is it unappreciated advances to a person with the intent of some kind of sexual interaction...or could it just be a cat call...or maybe even a wink of the eye? Personally I don't know many men that would decline advances..but that's a blog for another day...smile.

Does our society need to relive the sexual revolution of the 60's and 70's because we are that stuck up? Orrrr do we have to keep reminding ourselves that making those allegations can get an enemy at work fired(playing into the hater's mentality?
Perhaps even thinking that we can get some money from a lawsuit.

People do things for different reasons, but the number of complaints has risen
significantly over the last study....is it love vs. money...or greed vs. hatred/envy?

What ya'll think?

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Got the love for Jesus?

I had to make a post of this today! This video is about 9 minutes long so if you don't have the time to watch it...don't start it!

Don't skip forward because you will miss the amazing artwork in process!

This post is definitely for those who can appreciate God given talents!



I thank TWG for sharing it with me...

Enjoy and God be with you and yours!

Birthday Shout outs!!

I just want to take this time out today to say Happy Birthday to great awesome friends of mine.

First up is ABM...celebrating her 18th-21st birthday..smile!!

and last but not least our own Saadia aka girly_girl celebrating her 14th-21st birthday!

Happy Birthday ladies!



Monday, March 12, 2007

A Time to reflect!

Recent blogs of other acquired family members(Bloggers Unite) and conversations with friends has me reminiscing on one of the most impacting individuals of my entire life. That position of the high esteem is held by none other than my grandmother, Reba.

It's amazing to me how many emotions can be stirred up with a fleeting thought of a time long since past or a moment in time captured with a photo. Memories flood out of a Pandora's box never fully closed...kept unhinged for just such an occasion.

A song or Television show? Or maybe perhaps a stranger that passes by with striking resemblance to a loved one that has passed on from this life. I think the song that most influences my random memory recall would be" A song for Mama" by Boys II Men. Scarcely a time has past without the swelling of eyes and the instantaneously cleansing of my entire eye sockets courtesy of my overflowing tear ducts.

Now don't misconstrue the purpose of this post today..I am merely giving you an excerpt of my life...through my eyes. I am highlighting 1 of 2 women that unconditionally mean more to me than anything in the world. The second of these remarkable women being my mother, Jackie....but since she's still in the land of the living today, her role in this blog is not as active. She's ma dukes...Love her dearly...nuff said!!! The 2 women that without question loved me before I loved myself. Accepted me without question, no matter the flaw or my misgivings. So to partially quote a rather corny cliche..."This one's for you!"

As the night turned to day this morning, I found myself pondering the meaning of commercialized hallmark holidays. Just what can be done to highlight the life of one that has come and gone, leaving you with an empty feeling? Is there such a day? Would that be appropriate since everyone may not have the same "special someone" to reference? For me it would be my grandmother..it may be a different family member of perhaps not a blood related member at all for YOU!! Since commercialized and building up holidays that have absolutely no positive impact on American Culture, can we raise the stakes and get a day that will allow for us to reflect on those that are so dear to our hearts. President's day and other useless days that we recognize on your calendar are held in high esteem, why not a holiday theme reflecting on departed loved ones...Remembrance Day..a day whose sole purpose is to show reverence.

This particular idea was born of a recent article in the Cleveland Plain Dealer that exceptional rate of depression in people of color compared to (well you get the picture. I am a proud African American man and though this day is not ethnicity biased...I just scream for an additional outlet to help those that share my heritage!

If you could help bring about change and institute a day recognizing whatever you want...what would it be? or if you share my feelings, who would be your Remembrance Day honoree for 2007?

Friday, March 9, 2007

Trial by Fire!

lol...I have been enlightened! After my trial by fire with some of my favorite readers yesterday..I have but one more thing to say for myself!

I still plead the 5th!



However...OJ and Michael..still innocent!

Peace and love!

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Can't we all just get along?

Since I wouldn't want to be labeled as the perpetual bad guy after a few misunderstanding with some of my female readers. This one will help us get back on the same page!

Let me assure you that I have absolutely nothing but love for you and I want to prove it with my own complimentary rendition of a belated Happy Valentines Day present..

From me to you...with nothing but appreciation....


smooches!!

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

I Pleads the fifffffffffffth!

I am plagued with the duty of bringing yet another controversial topic to the family....smile!

I really am torn apart when it comes to this query that I am going to share with ya'll. I have found myself in the hot seat. Why do you ask? I'll tell you.

Have you ever had someone ask you a question and the answer to that question would have fuc***d them up if you told them the truth? You knew in your heart of hearts that they couldn't handle it, so you decided to lie instead. I'm forced to recall a situation with a friend of mine regarding a woman that the was dating. My friend asked me (in an approval seeking manner) how I thought his girlfriend looked to me. Now in reality, she was ugly as hell to me and I really didn't think that was going to work so I said she was fine and that he was lucky to get her. He smiled and agreed saying "yeah I was". Since I know that ni99a doesn't read blogs, I'm cool with sharing this topic. I was also forced to lie about my ex wife's cooking once or twice. Was telling her, "naw baby, that wasn't really too good" going to work out the next time i rubbed up against her trying to get some action....um...NOOOOOO! So I lied about it. Since my oldest son reads my blogs, I can't share too much about at the house, but sure...I may have embellished a few things to challenge him to do better.

Now before ya'll start thinking that I'm a dirty, rotten, lying bastard...let me spin this to another situation. I had a friend...very good friend in the hospital and the prognosis really wasn't going to be good and I was made privvy to it by his mother...should I have said "look dawg, you're pretty much fu***d up'? What would that have done to his hope?

Let's consider this question and put it to the campfire...If telling the truth will cause harm, physical pain, or endanger others..what would you do?

Though I mostly got my way out of it...I have been asked about cheating boyfriends/girlfriends, did I have sex with so and so, do you think any of my girlfriends attractive, who was the person that I said hello to...(damn I had alot of cousins)..hahahahahah when I couldn't get out of it...and a few unmentionables.

The serious question is...when is "OK" to tell a lie and not be punished for it? If I tell a lie to help someone, does that make me good? Better yet, If i tell a lie to get what I want ie:BOOTY...does that make me bad?

Let's kick this around to find out...exactly when it socially acceptable to bust off with a lie and why is there double standards about it? Or, should we just use our constitutional right and pleade the 5th amendment?...LOL

Let's hear about it!!

polite...or rudeness?

LOL...today I preformed a test and was not shocked at the results. I intentionally asked every single person within a 10 foot radius about their day. The "hey, how you doing" type of questions.

It started early in a busy gas station B.P., then went on to a Burger King on Lee Harvard in good ole Cleveland, Ohio. After, the experiment tapped into direct contact, I decided to take it a step further and make random phone calls to people on my cell phone.

Most people answer with the customary..."good and you"..

Here's the thing, I answered every last person with a very, very negative reply...I said "man..im fu****d up, taking a beating, don't know if I can make it another day", and a few other choice selections. You know what????...not one person actually listened to my answer.

Are we so wrapped up in ourselves that we really don't give a damn about the next person...or do we just continue to think that everyone is going to say the normal"I'm ok/alright..thanks for asking" and keep on stepping.

What do you do when someone asks you how you are doing? Do you return the question and if you do...wait for a reply?

I know I'm guilty of doing it...I wonder why though...do I really give a damn or am I trust trying to be polite? Which is in fact..being rude when I don't even listen to the answer..

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

oppositions to opposites attract theories

In order for me to be true to myself and my new found family of fellow writers, I have to extend sincere gratitude and appreciation for making me feel right at home. Thanks ya'll!!!

Now that I got that out of the way, let's kick it about a lil something something else.

IYMS alluded to it in a comment to Capcity yesterday regarding who we are and why we sometimes have issues with mates. It seemed too simplistic and I was like....dayum that makes a lot of sense. Then Rich tapped into a whole different kind of scenario referencing individualism in the home. I took a pause getting me to think that sometimes opposites attract and sometimes they repel . Do I want to have my alone time by the TV or do I want to watch it cuddled up? Are the movie I want to see and the movie she wants to see similar? Let's stay in..no let's go out! I was serious as hell when I wrote the blog about "who comes up with these rules?" I think my most avid rebuke of the rules had to be Cortney..head and shoulders above!! Straight up though, this isn't about rules, it's about whose going to give in the most. However, in a compromise don't we all feel a lil played if we didn't get it totally our way? That is wayyy too confusing to me!! Where does love take a stand? Is compromising considered a bitch move to a man?

In the getting to know each other, how the hell are you supposed to know some one's polarity? If the person ends up being Bi-polar we make out better cause they can come out of either bag and what was once a negative now becomes a positive! I know that sounds stupid, but let's just revisit our own comments twixt one another. If you have to constantly compromise, did you actually pick the right person? Isn't a "Soul Mate"...not that I advocate the use of the word..but just for discussion's sake mean that everything will fit into place without much effort? Impressive and thought provoking on so many different levels how we can pick what we think we want and end up with someone totally different. Ask yourself this, does our mate selection come from kindred spirits/like minded people? Artistic talents oftimes lend to eccentric personalities and who better understands us than people like us. I find myself asking, if I didn't date someone interested in what I wanted to do...would we run out of things to talk about...hmmmmm


Peep these thoughts and let's kick them around:

I really had a couple of simple questions that I wanted to bring up: Is your current relationship the person that you have the most in common with? Or how important is it that your mate loves what you do for living/hobby?

If that's not the case, do we run the risk of having another failed relationship or does "having our own thing" make it so that we don't have to constantly be around each other..thus creating a more peaceful environment.

As a confidante to both genders, I find that women tend to want to spend more time with their dudes...desiring to do things together. Male friends tend to lean more towards having a lil downtime with the fellas or off "doing me" time. I'm not saying women don't have the girls nights out. Just that some of the feedback that I get requires less time away than what I've gotten back from my homeboys.

Does that separate time bring a couple closer or give opportunities for outside influences to infiltrate and divide?

Tell me what you think...I'd love to hear male and female perspectives.

Today's revolution will not be televised!!

Although I have a blog that was prepared to be posted today, my revolutionist ideologies will not be televised! I choose to read the blogs of every single person in my new found family to support your flow. Rich's post has truly given me more appreciation of all of you.

I shudder to think what can be accomplished in the world of writing if we continue to draw inspiration from each other and support the creative flow in even this small community.

With the risk of sounding soft...I need everyone to keep up the good work so that I can draw from your strengths so that when you need it...I'm right there for you with your own reserves.

though stealing an altered cliche from girly_girl and Mizrepresent


Great Writers Unite!!

Monday, March 5, 2007

the most important person in the whole wide world!!!....IS YOU!!!

Over the weekend, I had some time to think about today's blogs! Originally It was going to be a ha ha, funny type of post but before I did that...I had to clear my head on some other things in this head of mine. I challenge everyone to look inside themselves and learn to be happier with who we are! Let's throw this one around the campfire!

I was pondering relationship patterns of future, current and past situations. Even in the course of a recent conversation, I was told that when romance is over, How do I get past it so fast? What is the deal breaker that allows for me to push on and get past people. I had to seriously give thought to both male and female relationships. What is the cut off point? Whose fault is it? When did things change? Was it really as bad as it seemed at the time? Was that person cheating, if so..what did I do create the setting? Why me?....wasn't I good enough? Was that person immature and did I just find out too late? Did I believe that my trust was misused? Was is that person just a worthless piece of sh*t? Is it worth it to maintain communication?

How does it look on the outside perception of my loved ones? If someone told me to beware of the relationship, would I have listened or tell them to mind their own business? Is it bad to put myself first sometimes? Or..Am I damaged goods?

The reality of having some of these questions raised regardless of whether it was a romantic involvement or with one of my boys helped me reach an epiphany! Like anyone else, I cleaned out my phone book several times over the last year. I've had some of my boys really try to do me dirty and for some reason I let some of those rotten Motherfu ****s stick around for even longer. Romantically, it was more difficult because the heart is open more and I probably didn't want to at first. However,a man's got to do what a man's go to do. My Biblical teachings say to turn the other cheek and to love my neighbor, butummmmmm...sometimes I'm admittedly not that Christlike in my approach.

This is a very touchy subject with some and may even help others. The purpose of this blog is to really get into the minds of where people are today. Single, Married, Male, Female, Heterosexual or any category....it matters not!!! It transcends romance and friendship, moving into self awareness and introspective acknowledgement. A serious look at oneself is great therapy! I once thought that me enhancing a woman that I was dating was only going to benefit the next man! Why not? Someone is doing that for me right now and they don't even know it. We all carry a lil bit from all of our past relationships. Why hate on the guy creating my perfect fit with his bullshit? He's only helping me out! Or why not help a brotha in need out this time? Maybe he will return the favor to someone else when/if he makes a come up.

Here's a thought: If you had one question that was burning inside of you regarding a past relationship(friend or romantic)that you wanted an answer for..what would it be? What is the single most "why"?

I'll go first: Why did my boy lie to me about why he needed to borrow some money from me, when I would have given it to him anyway, and when I found out the truth, hide from talking to me for the last 3 years?

Friday, March 2, 2007

Who comes up with these rules?

In some recent posts and conversations over the past month or so, I have come to the conclusion that much of what and how we define our lives is outlined in some "rulebook" or behavioral guidelines. I rebuke the rulebook and choose to be an "out of the box" thinker!!

Here are some that I want to throw up for discussion:

1. Waiting 3 days after getting a phone number to call-so you don't look desperate
2. What is cool about having the 1st date as a movie or dinner
3. Placing a time frame stipulation on having sex ie: 3 month rule(NEVER!!!!!)
4. Waiting for the night to end to get the "good kisses"
5. Making the first move is the man's responsiblity
6. Why do u have to have a fight to get the "animalistic sex" or break up to make up?
7. What does the 1st one to call back after an argument loses prove?
8. When is the "don't have to call 1st before stopping by" go into effect?
9. Should the man pay for every date/outing?
10.What is off limits conversation when the purpose is to get to know each other?

I was just curious and named a few that came to mind...there are thousands that are applicable..

Who's the first batter up to take a swing or to add to the list of rebukable rules AND WHY???

Thursday, March 1, 2007

here's my fave video..and why!

Call me a little bit of a narcissist, but I got a tremendous amount of enjoyment watching this video. I almost cried laughing seeing the obvious display of dismay and anguish.

A masterpiece collaboration of music and visuals.



My high school career had several dunks in it, but never to end a game with a game winner buzzer beater.

I guess I was able to live vicariously through the commercial and caught a glimpse of what could have been. Crushing the spirit and driving all those fans of the home team into that frenzy still makes me smile.

Damn...am I really that mean or do I just like the shoes?

I'll just buy the shoes because I like the commercial....LOL MJ does it to me again!

CHILD DIES FROM TOOTH ABSCESS? WTF!!!!

I am tripping out on this! Let's throw this up for some conversation today!!


http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/163856/child_dies_for_lack_of_dental_care.html

HERE'S THE FIRST PART OF THE ONLINE ARTICLE:

The Washington Post reported today that a twelve year old Prince George's County, Maryland boy died Sunday after the infection from an abscessed tooth spread to his brain. The boy had not been receiving routine dental care.

According to the Washington Post, twelve year old Diamonte Driver first complained of a headache six weeks ago. He was treated at a hospital for a tooth abscess, sinusitis and the headache. Shortly after beginning treatment, he was hospitalized at Children's Hospital in the District of Columbia and underwent two brain surgeries, the Post said.

Diamonte's mother did not have dental insurance or Medicaid coverage; a timely $80 tooth extraction could have saved his life, according to the Washington, Post.The Post reported that when Diamonte first began experiencing a toothache, his mother was having trouble finding a dental provider who would accept Medicaid to extract six abscessed teeth from Diamonte's younger brother DeShawn.. After finally finding an oral surgeon who would accept Medicaid and making an appointment for DeShawn, she learned that her Medicaid coverage had lapsed and cancled the appointment. The coverage lapse apparently occurred when her family moved had moved from the homeless shelter address listed on the Medicaid application.

The rest of the story is what it is...he died..bottom line!!

Wherein does the fault begin and end?